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We’re So Random
3 months ago
commentary on the christian culture.
For you formed my inward parts;I was born with the strong desire to have a plan. I’m not exactly talking about a nebulous idea of where I’m heading; I mean a clear, distinct path towards the future and the direction I’d like to head. I take great pride in the fact that if I work really hard at A, B, and C, one day I will most likely arrive at my destination of Z. I’ve always been like this—it is ingrained deeply in the fibers of my being. I make to-do lists for my to-do lists and thrive with schedules and dreams to work towards. As much as I wish I could live freely and spontaneously, I am uncomfortable when things go awry and immediately come up with a new plan to get back on track.
you knitted me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them.
"I should accomplish everything, with perfection, as soon as humanly possible or forever shame my ancestors and bring dishonor upon my family",but we follow it with
"I CAN AND WILL DO EVERYTHING AND NOTHING YOU SAY CAN DISSUADE ME, YE ARSE."I know, I know - it's a really stupid way to live. It's exhausting and disappointing and extremely frustrating. And the hilarious reality is that we bring it upon ourselves. No one else it putting these expectations on us, no one else is pushing us this hard, no one else really cares about our goals and deadlines but ourselves.
Capacities clamor to be used, and only cease their clamor when they are well-used. That is, capacities are also needs. Not only is it fun to use our capacities, but it is also necessary. The unused capacity can become a disease center, or else atrophy, thus diminishing the person.
The place for which He designs them in His scheme of things is the place they are made for. When they reach it their nature is fulfilled and their happiness attained: a broken bone in the universe has been set, the anguish is over. When we want to be something other than the thing God wants us to be, we must be wanting what, in fact, will not make us happy.
It takes great courage to grow up and become who you really are.So yes, it's been scary and weird and at times extremely difficult to try and be who I really am and not the Adult Me that my littler self created. But it's also invigorating and freeing in a way I simply cannot explain. Because it reminds me of that deep and resounding truth: that I'm not my job, I'm not my apartment, I'm not anyone's expectations (especially my own) -